so there’s this picture going around the internet of a guy doing a modified pincha mayurasana (forearm balance) in the middle of a bikram studio with a bunch of indignant girls sitting around, utterly unamused. on it is the caption “don’t be a yoga douche”. it’s gotten hundreds of “likes” on facebook, followed by hundreds of comments. and i have a confession to make. i’m a yoga douche.
i like to jump into handstand in the middle of the sun salutations…twice. i like to take funky transitions out of arm balances. i like to push myself to my edges. but please don’t think i’m doing this for you. i don’t want an audience. i just want to practice. and that’s my practice.
i guess there are some people out there who do this stuff looking for attention. i promise that’s not me. i’m working on some stuff that challenges me. and, yes, one day i’d like to be that super-douche who can press up effortlessly into a handstand in her sleep. that may or may not ever happen for me, but i’m sure enjoying the process.
when i practice, i’m not looking around the room to see what anyone else is doing. i don’t care what anyone else is doing. that’s their business. their personal practice. so why are people so concerned with what the yoga douches are doing?
ultimately, it comes back to ego. you don’t hate me. your ego does. because maybe i can do something that you can’t do and that makes you feel frustrated or jealous or inferior or…i don’t know. what comes up for you? hell, i’ve watched certain yogi/nis practice and felt jealous. i’ll admit it. but part of the practice is letting go of my ego, and releasing my judgement of them, and of me. we are both just doing the best we can.